Closure
by K0nflicti0n
Summary: After a day spent together Kensi and Deeks receive an unexpected PURELY a one shot


**A/N: ok so a little story idea that has popped into my head from all the stories floating around with Jack in them lately. This is going to be a one shot plain and simple and I hope you guys like it. Not your typical Jack/Kensi fic.**

Deeks and Kensi were in her car as they drove down the street that would lead to her place. They had been out enjoying the day and were returning from visit a street fair that they had both wanted to check out and had just gone together as friends, well that's what they both were telling themselves even though on several occasions during their time at the fair they had done couple-like things. Like Kensi winning a foot tall Scooby-Doo plushy and giving it to Deeks with a cocky grin and Deeks licking his finger to get some powdered sugar from Kensi's cheek. All in all they had a great time and really enjoyed each other's company.

But their jovial mood was about to come crashing down around them, hard. As they neared Kensi's home they both spotted the blue Honda civic that was parked in front of her house with a medium build man leaning against the hood of the car. As Kensi pulled her SRX up behind the Honda and cut off the engine the unknown man turned around and Kensi felt her heart drop into her stomach and her breathing hitch. Deeks of course noticed Kensi's reaction and he looked from the unknown man to her. "Kens….Hey Kensi you ok?"

"I…..I don't know." Kensi's uncharacteristic response instantly set Deeks on edge. She never said she didn't know how she was because she was always 'fine'.

"You know that guy?" Deeks asked getting a little worried as to what was going on and turned his head towards the car as the man moved from the front of his car to the passenger side and stood next to the curb with his hands on his pockets but his body language was practically screaming that he was nervous and on edge

"Its….." Kensi swallowed the lump in her throat before she turned to face Deeks. "That's Jack." She said softly and she bit her lower lip nervously. Deeks stared at her in confusion for a while before Kensi's reaction and the name hit him like a ton of bricks.

"Oh." He said softly and he looked at Jack and then back to Kensi. "Do you want me to do anything?"

"Just….gah I don't know just wait by the car." Kensi said softly as she undid her seatbelt and reached.

"Ok. I'll be right here if you need me." Deeks said softly and he watched as Kensi climb out of her SUV and make her way towards Jack, who was still standing next to his car. "Man this is not going to end well." Deeks muttered to himself as he undid his seatbelt and slowly climbed out of the car and stood there with the car door open as he stood behind it.

"Jack." Kensi said flatly as she stood a few feet away from him with her arms folded across her chest.

"Hey Kens." He returned evenly and he started to fidget a little bit. "You….You look good Kensi, happy." He said with a bit of a smile on his face.

"Yeah well I wasn't very happy after you left me." Kensi shot back coolly with doing a pretty good job of keeping the bitterness she still felt for him out of her voice. "On Christmas morning." Jack sucked his lips hard against his teeth and he looked down at his feet and shuffled them. When he didn't respond for several seconds Kensi sighed heavily at his actions, or lack thereof. "What do you want Jack?"

"I…I wanted to say I'm sorry. I would have told you sooner but being in a VA Mental Hospital for almost a year made that hard to do." Jack said evenly as he looked up at Kensi and noticed the shocked look on her face. "Sorry if that upset you but it's the truth. That's where I went the night I left you." He said softly and took a step towards her and stopped when Kensi instinctively moved back from him. From behind Kensi Jack saw the disheveled blonde that had been in the car with Kensi move from behind the car door and he moved back to where he had just been standing. "Kensi I'm not gonna hurt you. Can you tell your uh…..can you tell him I'm not here to hurt you." Jack said as he pulled a hand form his pocket and pointed over Kensi's shoulder at Deeks. "In fact from the way he is looking at you I want him to hear what I came here to say….If that's ok with you?"

"And what did you come here to say Jack? That you're sorry? That you had a reason to leave and not tell me why you left me on Christmas morning?" Kensi couldn't keep the bitterness out of her voice as she glared daggers at him.

"Yeah." His voice was soft and had a defeated tone to it. "I'm guessing he knows who I am since he looks like he wants to break my neck. I just want you to know the truth….and I think he will need to hear it too."

Kensi just stood their staring at Jack for a while before she turned her head to face Deeks and nodded at him to come over. As she waited for Deeks she turned back to face Jack and noticed that he had take a few small steps backwards. This struck her as really odd because even when Jack had been struggling with PTSD after he came back from Iraq he had never been one to back away from anything. When Kensi felt Deeks shoulder lightly brush up against hers she spoke up.

"Jack Sanders, Marty Deeks."

"Hey." Said timidly and looked at Deeks who simply nodded at him.

"So what's the truth Jack?"

"I'm sorry I left you Kensi. I know it was cowardly of me to do it like that after you bent over backwards to help me and put your life on hold. But…" Jack paused and shakily pulled a hand out of his jeans and reached into his coat pocket and pulled out a pill bottle and quickly popped two of them into his mouth and snapped his head back and swallowed them. "I uh…The truth is Kens I left to protect you."

"Protect me? How the hell was leaving me on out first Christmas since you got back from Iraq protecting me?" Kensi shot at him angrily.

"That night I had a nightmare…you know the kind." He said as he put the pills back in his coat and looked at her sadly and was relieved when she nodded. "Only that time…..that time you didn't wake up to help me. I woke up on my own and…Kensi I was kneeling over you and my hands were inches from your neck." Jack said as he looked down at the ground.

Kensi had been expecting some bullshit story and for him to try and get her back but this, this was something she had never imagined in her wildest dreams. And why should she never once had Jack yelled at her or lost his temper when he came back from Iraq, and now to hear him tell her he had almost strangled her during a nightmare while she was asleep. Kensi know this startled Deeks to because he instinctively moved a little closer to her.

"I…Kensi I was so unbelievable angry when I came to. My nightmare had been so real, so vivid….I swear it even smelled like I was back over there. And then when I saw my hands that close to your neck….It broke me. I knew I could have easily killed you that night if I hadn't snapped out of it." Jack paused as he looked up at her and she could tell he was holding back tears because he was reliving that night all over again. "The thought that I could do that to you…even in my sleep….Well it scared me, more than anything in Iraq had scared me so I left. I drove to the VA Hospital in San Diego and checked myself into the psych ward." Jack moved to lean against his car and he looked at Kensi's home and then back to her and Deeks.

"After they said I was ok and released me I was staying in a group home for other Vets with PTSD and were recovering. Got a job and used to being around people and what have you….That was a few years ago. After I got well enough to live on my own I started looking for you….I just wanted you to know why." Jack said as he looked at the ground expecting Kensi to yell at him or just walk away from him and he waited for the sound of a door being closed.

But he was shocked when he saw a pair of booted feet that obviously belonged to a woman enter his vision and were a few inches from his. "Jack look at me." Kensi voice was soft and calm and Jack slowly did what she told him. As he made eye contact with her he could tell she was fighting to hold back tears and she gave him a sad smile.

"I understand why you left now….I'm not saying I forgive you for the hell you put me through but I get it….I'm glad you're better Jack, really I am…..But you leaving broke me, made me think I wasn't good enough to help you…." Kensi paused as she reached up with right index finger and wiped the tears away before they could run down her face. "I don't think I'll ever be able to forgive you for leaving but at least you left for the right reasons and got help. I'm proud fo you for that." Kensi couldn't stop herself and pulled Jack into a tight hug and after a few seconds Jack returned the hug. The two former lovers stood there hugging and crying before they finally pulled back from each other.

Jack nervously laughed at the fact that he was crying and Kensi had to do the same thing before he looked over at Deeks. "You look out for her ok? Don't screw up like I did." Jack said in a matter of fact tone to Deeks who simply nodded the affirmative at Jack before the prior Marine turned his gaze back to Kensi. "And you take care of yourself. Like I said I'm glad to see you happy." Jack said as he leaned in and kissed Kensi on the forehead before he walked around his car and climbed into the driver's side and started the engine and pulled away soon merging into L.A. traffic and disappearing once again from Kensi, but this time they both had the closure they needed.

After Kensi had watched Jack drive off leaving her again she didn't feel anger or resent me for him. Instead she felt as if this huge weight had been lifted from her shoulders and chest and for the first time in years she smiled when she thought about him. Deeks walked up beside her and looked in the direction Jack had left before he turned his deep blue eyes to look at Kensi.

"Kensi you ok?"

"I will be Deeks, thanks." She said as she looked at him and smiled. "Thank you for being there."

"I always will be." Deeks said as he put an arm around her shoulders and turned them around to face her front door. "Come on partner I'll buy you a pizza and we can watch some Top Model and have a couple beers." With that the two friends walked towards Kensi's apartment and they were both smiling.

**A/N: I hope you guys liked this. It wasn't my way of making Jack to not be a bad guy it was just a different take on how he dealt with PTSD and a bit of my own personnel history thrown in there since I had a hard time dealing with my own PTSD after I got out of the Marines. Thanks again for taking the time to read.**


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